SomethingAwfulList

somethingawfullist > casual encounters

43 y/o male looking for casual meeting in public place- m4w-43

Reply to: murray@murrayswebdomain.com
Date: 2006-06-08, 10:44PM PDT


I would like for us to run into each other on the street perhaps when you are late for work and we would say hi because we kind of know each other and maybe I would offer to buy you a cup of coffee but Iwouldn't really mean it becaue I am also late (not for work but dentist appointment) and you would decline and then we would say goodbye a kwaradly because we don't even remember eachothers names anyway this is the kind of encounter I am looking for not serious at all.

hIt me up if you want a no string attached meeting you can forget a couple minutes later onthe bus.

• this is in or around Seattle
  
• no-- it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
  

somethingawfullist > rooms & shares

room to rent for CHEAP please LOOK

Reply to: angelofthelord@christschurchandsteakhouse.com
Date: 2006-06-08, 11:56PM PDT


200 sq ft large master bedroom in good neighborhood kitchen privileges included you will have to share the bed with my Aunt Gilda who is 98 and sometimes thinks she is a cat and she always sleeps naked also all utilities paid!!

• this is in or around Kansas City
  
• no-- it's NOT ok to if you can read this you do not need glasses commercial interests
  

somethingawfullist > missed connections

think this could be love

Reply to: robopirate@ebaumsworld.com
Date: 2006-06-10, 8:32AM PDT


Me- medium height, "curvy" in masculine way, "dumbledore is not dead" t-shirt. You - tight jeans, nice tits, did not get good look at face or hair but I think maybe blond(?)

Saw you outside of gaming store (that's really cool if you like games if not (like you were there waiting for someone else) that is also cool I think we could work the issue out) but was too shy, however I think you saw me staring. Thank you for turning around to show me that nice butt of yours. Walking away so I could see it go back and forth was nice but you were gone so quickly!!

Anyway I was putting this out on the internet just in case. It may seem unlikely but probably lots of happy couples got started through ads like this like my mom and dad (they met at a charity walk and then dated casually for a month or so before becoming serious and then marrying after six years of dating which is kinda similar to this) Until then I will be at "our spot". I will wear my "Azeroth is for lovers" shirt so you know it's me.

• this is in or around Camarillo
  
• no-- it's NOT ok to pontaic this coaster with nervous or other communal insects
  

somethingawfullist > missed connections

stuck in texas

Reply to: fwebers@firstprudential.webmail.com
Date: 2006-06-10, 11:08AM PDT


I missed my connecting flight from Houston to Miami and am quite angry about this please email to discuss.

• this is in or around Houston
  
• yes-- please spam the shit out of this poster
  

somethingawfullist > lost & found

to murder is but to midwife death

Reply to: fasternow@beatthedeafeningdrumsoffate.us
Date: 2006-06-10, 1:56PM PDT


I have stabbed a man to death. The blood drips off my hands like a crimson mockery of the rain that impregnates a fertile land. It gathers into a sticky pool of fluid life, now drained from my victim.

What is it, this existence of ours? Lucifer weeps...

• this is in or around the shade at the edge of humanity
  
• gone-- like a child's innocence snatched from her by cruel time's passing I
  

somethingawfullist > architect/engineer/CAD jobs

Reliability Quality Engineer with medical device experience

Reply to: hiringmanager@professionaljobservices.com
Date: 2006-06-10, 10:00PM PDT


DO U WANT TO SEE AN ANGEL?

JUST HOLD UR BREATH AND SCROLL SLOWLY DOWN UNTIL U SEE TEXT

*

*

*

*

*

*

*KEEP WAITING

*

*

*

*

*ALMOST THERE

*

*

*

NOW LOOK IN THE MIRROR AND U’LL SEE ONE OF GOD’S MOST SPECIAL ANGELS :)

POST THIS AGAIN UNDER THREE DIFFERENT MISLEADING TITLES OR GOD WON’T LOVE U ANYMORE AND SATAN WILL HAVE UR SOUL…

• this is in or around San Fierro
  
• no-- it's NOT ok but probably morally justified to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
  

somethingawfullist > miscellaneous romance

please help me contact my special lady

Reply to: redwall42@hotmail.com
Date: 2006-06-10, 5:15PM PDT


I am calling on ALL of Kansas City to help me. I spent three wonderful nights sharing a bed with a beautiful mature lady while renting a room in her house. She was a FIRECRACKER, always meowing and scratching at my chest but when the woman I was renting from discovered our hidden passion she kicked me out. I still remember with a broken heart the soft mewls of my lover gently fading to grieving snores as she fell asleep again five seconds after hearing I was leaving.

They have a restraining order now and I think I may have a sex crime record I AM NOT SURE!!! Help me contact my "Wrinkled Kitty"!!!!

• this is in or around Kansas City
  
• no-- it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
  

somethingawfullist > real estate for sale

fully furnished castle available inquire about price

Reply to: mario@mushroomkingdom.biz
Date: 2006-06-10, 11:02PM PDT


I have found myself the owner of a wonderful antique castle. Great location, all levels beaten on the way here so you should have no problems getting in or out. The only reason I am moving from this great property is that I have been informed that the princess is, in fact, in another castle. This was quite frusterating for me, but my loss is your gain!

Features

• Lava pits (great for garbage disposal!)
• Stack of monster corpses perfect for stuffing and display!
• Top shelf security system including Bullet Bills, Fireballs, and Chain Chomps.

Please contact for price and also if you’ve heard anything about the location of the princess.

• this is in or around Mushroom Kingdom
  
• yes-- it IS ok to make cheap video game jokes in your article
  

somethingawfullist > writing/editing jobs

need immediate freelance writer for work on article conclusion

Reply to: maxnmona@somethingawful.com
Date: 2006-06-11, 12:04AM PDT


I am looking for someone able to write a concluding paragraph for a comedy article. Applicant must: Work odd hours, be able to mention maxnmona@somethingawful.com somewhere in all conclusions, be able to conclude things promptly and in a professional manner.

Remember, without you, articles may well just end abruptly.

• this is in or around SomethingAwful.com
  
• no-- it's NOT NOT NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
  

– Joseph "Maxnmona" Fink