Subj: RATSPLUS ENHANCED

This article is part of the Roamin' Dad series.

HELLO!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am hard at work on my million dollar idea RATS PLUS the best idea so far. I have 7 rats in a series of buckets and tubs and pipes and they are living the dream with me in my Home. This is all you need to know about RatsPlus Enhanced!!!! It is a small fee each month to keep up in the world of Rats but the millions of people paying the fee will keep me a millionaire. It is my new Hot Web Property That will show you what's up in the world of rats if you are a social media maven. I have a bunch of rats now and I'm beaming them to you on the Internet. SEO Search Engine Optimization and Marketing For Rats. Subscribe now and Check em out

Rico loves eating straw and food. Its his favorite thing... aside from Betty that is !!!
4 minutes ago

Betty is running around like a wild rat. What a beast
9 minutes ago

Betty is doing a rat act that we can't talk about. What a time she is having. Wow she seems to love it a lot. It is gross to me the narrator, but she loves it.
11 minutes ago

Rico is talking I think he is saying "I Love RatsPlus I would Pay For It If I Had A Concept Of Money" and getting sniffy on her rump
14 minutes ago

Rico is sniffing around Betty like a wild man!!! Wow are they going to mate or what.
15 minutes ago

Brian is dead He got a burial in the garbage
16 minutes ago

Betty is a bigtime runner on the wheel. She loves it, she loves to run. It probably makes her want to have Rat Babies as evidenced by Rico trying to sniff while she runs on the rat wheel. Her running makes her want to Do it
22 minutes ago

We are going to remove Brian from the RatsPlus webcam if he stops moving again
23 minutes ago

Wow the rat fun is happening now. They are running around in a circle but some of them look mad or sick. We will figure it out as the day goes on.
40 minutes ago

Rat Mate Alert
We will call you if there is a Rat Mate Alert if you want. Just call the regular number and request the Rat Mate Alert. You have to call us and say it in your voice "I Want To Know When The Rats Are Mating Or When They Are Doing The Deed" and then we will ask you to confirm this by saying it again "I Want To Know When They Bone. I Want To Hear All About When They Bone" and then we will ask what kind of alerts you want (text or audio) and you will have to say "I Want You To Call Me When The Rats Are Getting Wild In An Adult Way" and then we will ask you one more time to say it again and confirm it "I Want You To Call Me When The Rats Are Humping" and from a business point of view we can't hire a sexy sounding woman to call people all the time when the rats are doing stuff so it helps to have to make you go through several steps to make sure you really want it.

Right now it is only me but I am pumping out the rat updates as fast as I can. Get it on the ground floor with the rats and me also. BYE!!!!!!!!!!!!!DAD

– Dad (@fart)