This article is part of the Online Anarchy series.
That last decade we had showed a lot of promise, didn't it? Computers were new and exciting and evolving at a good clip, and there were a number of near-futuristic hacker films to spur the idea that the Internet was this close to having some kind of mysterious underground interface with 3D binary code and plans for making atom bombs flying around all over the place. We never got the 3D, but there sure were all kinds of junior terrorists quietly spreading what little useless knowledge they had around like an STD of the brain. What's more, other people downloaded and collected these text files and kept spreading them along to others. Willingly, even!
This is a follow-up to XOZero's first guide. It seems like he's matured a little more since February. Maybe you could say he's battle-hardened. I guess community service changes a man, especially when the judge raises his voice.
Before I post the file I should also remind you that some of these are very dangerous activities, and carrying them out can have pretty harsh consequences. Be careful out there, buddy, and stay out of trouble. I'd hate for you to be escorted out of a Sizzler.
T H E
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--== G U I D E B O O K V O L U M E I I ==--
--== B Y : X O Z E R O J U N E 6 , 1 9 9 3 ==--
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"I put medicine in my grandpas oatmeal and it gave him the runs
thank you prince of terror. signed THE ANARCHY PROFESSOR"
"First of all i just want to say DOWN WITH THE GOVERNMENT AND ALL
AUTHORITY FIGURES!! By the way your suggestion of blowing on my
arm to make loud fart noises works great. Rock On. Jason."
Well there you have it folks in the many months since my first tips
hit the main stream I have helped you all change the world for the
better. But now a lot of guys have also told me "Stuart This Thing
You Write Is Bad News Alot Of Guys Can Get Hurt" well I have some
news for you lettuce head: Your stupid. Im anarchist. Deal with it.
Alot of things have changed since my last text phile... I am 15 and
a man now and Im much older and wiser so i have decided that The
Time for Childs Play is OVER!! We are no longer just pranksters we
are revolutionarys. If we are going to do this we have to get real
and do some things that will bring about change in the world and
take the power away from the fatcats. If your with me then read on.
If your the FBI or a cop then stop reading right now and your fat.
This phile contains ways to give you the anarchist power in todays
world. Some tips are about personal power and others are about the
movement. Either way all of this information is dangerous so if
the cops or parents find it on your computer its not my fault.
On with the tips....
GROAN MAN
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Next time you find yourself in a movie theater with a cop or some
body you hate here is what you should do: groan very loud every few
minutes like "URRRRGHHH" and "Unnnggghhh Aggghhh" and after a bunch
of times doing this the people in the group will start to think
about their hair and breath and if they look ok. Then go out to
the parking lot and find the car of the person you dont like and
write a letter that says "Dear Person, It's me the groaning man
from inside the movie. I wanted you to know that I was groaning
about you. Good bye." They feel bad now Mission acomplished.
FARM FEAR
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Some times in school you get to take a trip to a dairy to find out
where the milk comes out of cows and there is a lot of chances
for mayhem there. The best way is to scare a cow because then the
cow doesn't make milk if it has a spook in its heart. Here is how
I do it with diagrams:
O <------ me cow-----> ___{}
/| / |
A <--- my legs ||w||
Diagram 1: I am looking at a cow
O ___{}
/| / |
A ||w||
Diagram 2: I am getting close to the cow.
GUUUUUGALLAB ABBAHAHLAHG AHHHH!!!!!
|
O/ ___{}
| ---==== / |
A ----==== //w //
Diagram 3: The cow is running from me at LIGHTENING SPEED
Congratulations you have given that cow something to think twice
about when it comes time for makeing milk.
SALAD BARBAROSSA
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
So is your worst enemy going to Sizzler tonight?? There is a good
chance for mischief there and its easy too. I don't know if its
like this at most places but at my local Sizzler the salad bar has
doors underneath and they are empty so you can climb inside and
shake the salad bar and grunt when someone uses it. Do that and
they will not eat very much salad and not get their moneys worth.
If they go get the manager to tell them something is up with the
salad bar you can just tell the manager that you work there and
they will buy it because the customer is always right.
COSBY CONUNDRUM
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sometimes when you go to a store they have a lot of TVs set up and
running to show you that the TV works before you buy it. If you
can you should sneak up and change one of the TV channels to the
Cosby Show and start watching. Then when someone comes up and is
all like "Oh The Cosby Show" you can say "Yeah.. But I Already Seen
This One..." and they will think "Wow He's Smart" then you can
somehow swindle them for money I dont know how to do that yet.
SOCIAL ENGINEERING
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Social engineering is one of the easiest ways to get money from
people because its so simple. People have been doing it since
egyptian times. Heres my favorite tip for engineering at school:
Get 6 girls in a group and get them to form a human pyramid. Find
out where they put their backpacks down and steal the backpack of
one of the girls on the bottom level because she cant get away to
go chase you. There is probably money inside and makeup that you
can use to disguise yourself against cops during other mayhem.
DOUBLE DARE DOOMSDAY
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
One of the best things to do is to go to school and tell conformers
that Marc Sumers is going to start filming Double Dare at the
school starting next year. Then they will say "Wow really? Tell me
more about that" and then you say "Yeah but hes going to make even
more rules at this school" and everyone hates rules so they will
get conflicted emotions inside becuase Double Dare is wild and has
few rules but Marc Sumers wants to make rules so while they think
about that for a minute you can wait for a cute girl to walk by
and then say the other person smells like B.O. and onions.
CLOTHES STORE SABOTAGE
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
There are lots of ways to mess with a clothes store. A good one is
to find a circular rack of clothes and sit down in the middle of it
where you cant be seen then start spinning the entire thing around
really slowly. Soon a man or lady will come up and start looking at
the clothes and say that this new technology that spins the rack
is very impresive. Then you climb out and say "Actually it was just
me.....an anarchist..." and walk away. The customer will think less
of the store because of this and maybe never shop there again so
that is a job well done.
FISHING FRENZY
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A great place for anarchy is out on the lake. Go steal or borrow or
buy a canoe and go out to the middle of the lake early in the
morning when a lot of old guys are out in their boats fisihing and
start scaring away the fish while flicking a bunch of the guys off
and make friends with some others. Then when the mad guys come and
start to ram your boat and yell at you you can call your allies
for help and get a naval war started but try to get out of there
before they begin boarding enemy ships and seting fires.
Well thats all for now I cant write much because Im grounded from
the computer for 3 weeks but I had some time tonight because my
stepdad drank some wine and fell asleep at the kitchen table.
Till next time, my brothers and sisters.....
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THIS FILE CAME FROM
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|R|a|n|d|y|'|s| |C|a|s|t|l|e|
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formerly Randy The Ripper's BBS
/----------------- SYSOPS ----------------
| Randy The Ripper MR. DEATH killbeast |
| STABSKULL VON MURDER BloodLust Dennis |
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– Johnny "Doc Evil" Titanium (@fart)
