Kickstarters Ended with Zero Backers

By The X-Com: Enforcer Team

Asked: $750,000

The original team behind 2001's action-FPS have reunited to bring you all of the fast-paced alien-blasting you could ever want. Currently rated 8.3 on Metacritic by gamers, X-Com: Enforcer launched the X-Com franchise in an exciting new direction. People keep playing knockoff X-Com games, inferior copies, and wondering why they can't just have that good X-Com fun that they loved. We're here to offer an authentic X-Com title, exactly like the original Enforcer game updated for modern platforms.

By Tucker Cheney

Asked: $100,000

Hi this is a repost of my kickstarter "I Want to Hunt a Baby Elephant" that was not fully funded. I wanted to repost and clarify: I am only interested in doing this legally. I don't have any respect for elephants, I think they are arrogant, but I am not asking to fund a poaching expedition. To this end I have dropped the amount I am asking and I have looked into it and I can buy a baby elephant for 100k as long as I claim my back yard is a zoo. I will tie a baby elephant up to my clothesline in the back and I will kill it. I don't know how yet. Maybe all the people who contribute at least $1,000 will get to vote on a selection of weapons. I think I'd like to blast it with a sawed off shotgun. Don't worry this will be an orphaned baby elephant so his mom won't care.

By Fontanelle Bacigalupi

Asked: $20,000

My dog recently died and was brought back to life by a miracle. He experienced the reality of the afterlife as told in the Bible. He saw deceased friends, lost toys and he got to run in a big cloud-wrapped field. He told it all to me in a dream and I am willing to tell his story in a book and speak at churches. Also I am available to give talks to kids about not feeding your dog eight pounds of roast beef and what a mess he will make when he dies and suddenly comes back to life with eight pounds of roast beef packed into him. I will pray for everyone who donates. Thank you and god bless.

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– Zack "Geist Editor" Parsons (@sexyfacts4u)