E/N Spotlight!

The Electralux - Oh no! Horribly deep and potentially scarring information regarding myself, you, and ALL of mankind is revealed in today's update! Folks... it doesn't look too good. You may want to brace yourself for this one.

You are a sheep. You come into this clique with your "morals" and holier-than-thou attitude and flutter about and wonder how no one could resist yur oh-so-charming attitude and wit. You waddle about in a cacoon of reputation with your friends, honking every now and then like the chicken shit geese you are.

I am a horrible monster and I pray for death! Somebody please deliver my unworthy carcass to the Hellish afterlife, as my corroded personality is a poison to the world. Look at me, I am deep and introspective because I call everybody sheep! Whee!

Rating:

Four damaged brains.

Charged Particle - So many updates, so little time!

Tomorrow I'm flying home. Hooray. :) Get to see my girlfriend and all that good stuff. I can't wait. Flying is fun too. I will like it.

It is late, time for sleep. Sleep sleep sleep. I am tired. Really Really tired. *collapse*

I'm here. The flight was fine, and was very quick.. Hahaha.. I laugh at the poor shmucks stuck in traffic as I cruise overhead at 3,000 ft. :) Anyway, time for some food and then to go to the homecoming parade and game.

Time to pick up th' flowers and get fancied up. Then it's me, my girlfriend and a bunch of friends out to dinner and then more good times. :) I may post when I get home around 4 in the morning. Maybe.

This is indeed what it sounds like when the doves cry. He also has a screenshot of what his computer desktop looks like. That's entertainment with a capital "E"!

Rating:

Four damaged brains.

Caken.com - As I've told NUMEROUS people before, I am not Caken.com. They are not a practical joke. That is a REAL website. You can finish loading your gun now.

friday ruled for me, i had so much fun, and like, it was like hte funnest time i had in the longest time, ok here another thing, i leave my aim running 24/7 if im not hear i put up an away message,, but i also use the accept message thingy, there for, if u IM me when IM no there, and i have an away message up, u dont see my away message, there for u get all fuckin pissy cause i dotn fuckin respond, and when i do get home, or wake up, the people arnt even online, and theres no point addin names to my buddy list, i tried that, when it got up to 160 (i usually only have about 30 on my list) i was like fuck it, so there for. if i dont respond to u, try imin me again like in 5 hours or somthing---krystal

Keep in mind that these people are supposed to be in SCHOOL. LEARNING. I strongly believe that the two girls from Caken.com are two-thirds of Cerebus.

Rating:

FIVE damaged brains.

Stinkbug - I think spending all day, trying to figure out ways to cram more images of the webmaster's head onto the page, has turned the Stinkbug guy into a boring nutcase. Oh no, wait, this is an e/n site, this is perfectly acceptable and expected behaviour. Check out these gems of updates, each one separate from the last:

Going out to eat. Be back later tonight.

Going out to have dinner with my family tonight.

hmmm... Tuesday. Not much else to say.

I think it's nap time.

Going to a game. Be prepared for anything when I get back.

Not a lot going on right now. Have a lot of things on my mind, thats about it.

My camera software freaked out sometime last night

My computer locked up again last night some time. Oh well, it looks like the cam and everything is working again. I will probably be gone all day again today. I will back tonight, if not, it will be in the morning.

If you hear any odd noises coming from your computer, you can be 100% sure that's the sound of me weeping for Baby Jesus.

Rating:

Four and a half damaged brains.

Disorganized Crime - Awwww yeah, here comes some more hard-hitting philosophy for yo' dope ass! Check it, yo:

I am nothing. I am no-one. I do not know who I am. I do not know who I am supposed to be. My existance is validated by nothing you can see, nothing you can understand. I live in a world of make believes; shielding myself from the outside world, convincing myself that I'm something I'm not. Most people have a path to follow. I have no path. I wander meaninglessly through life; stopping here, stopping there, never really knowing where I'm going. All I want is genuine respect for once in my life. All I want is for someone to tell me that I matter, that I have a place. I'm so sick of not knowing what the fuck is going on. I'm tired of having to hide myself from people because I'm too scared of what they'll think. All that I can see in my life is the blank stare of my meaningless 'friends' who care not so much for me as for their fucking image. Where do I fit in? Where the fuck is my 'special place'? Well fuck it. The whole world's gone to hell, and I'm going with it.

Hey, isn't he just quoting a NIN song? As for me, I'm tired of the long lines at the In and Out Burger. Oh yeah, and my mom said I can't tell you about my "special place", so don't ask!

Rating:

Four damaged brains.

– Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka (@TwitterHasBannedAllMyAccountsEver)