The Top 17 Worst FPS Games

#5: "Bloodlust"

Whoo, another gem from Kausill! Shave southern belles to death in a very bland underworld maze built as a tribute to the Blood God or something who wants to kill everybody on the planet. I guess it turns out that worshipping a guy who wants to murder you during an act of extreme, unbridled genocide isn't such a hot idea. Keep that in mind if you ever consider following my Twitter account.

#4: "Smarty Lab Galaxy"

Joe Anderson is another repeat offender here in the Gamemaker Hall of Fuck Yous, having created the inexplicable "Catland Versus Pounland" series of games, which should ideally consist of less than one title but for whatever reason contains many more. Mix one broken 3D game engine with a broken 3D coding language, throw in ridiculously awful voice acting / art design / gameplay decisions / fill in the blank here, and you've got whatever the hell this mess is. Hope you enjoyed it, because next up is

#3: "Smarty Lab Counterattack!"

Dear Joe Anderson:

Stop.

Sincerely,
Me

#2: "Erned Laser"

I think whoever created this was hitting the acid a little too hard, because this game demolishes the walls of logic in an insane orgy of destruction. I am literally incapable of figuring out any aspect of this game. You name it, I have no idea. Let's leave it at that, emphasis on the "leave it" part.

#1: "Flapper Racers"

This obscene kart-racing game is so monumentally revolting that I'm including it on the Top 17 Worst FPS Games, even though it clearly is not a FPS. This should give you a slight hint towards my opinions and attitudes towards this less-than-stellar racing title created by Satan for bad people. Horrifying and bizarre characters compete against each other in a race to escape their own obscene ungodly ugliness. Game claims to be a demo, so you have the complete, full edition to look forwards to, which should place up there with extensive dental work or WWIII. WARNING: MUSIC AND ART WILL MAKE YOU REGRET EXISTING.

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– Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka (@TwitterHasBannedAllMyAccountsEver)