Scotty (Lowtax) - My son Scotty and I are designing a web-page to convert the filthy homosexual animals back into HUMAN BEINGS again! Praise the Lored! Did he tell you about the web-page ideas?
Anointed - Yes sir... I gave him a couple of pointers as well about looking like a sit of theirs with the message color coded until the end. But again, you need direction from the LORD exactly how.
Scotty (Lowtax) - Oh sir, I do indeed have that. I was preaching the other day to the Followers of the Light and Jeasus, when suddenly I became crestfallen and tumbled to the floor like a sack of potatoes! When I was out, I began having visions of homosexuals staring into their monitor of SIN and realizing Jezus was the one true way!! That is how I devised the idea of hypnotizing the Satanic miscreants with holy, pure messages! My boy Scotty is helping me with this!
Anointed - since satan operates in the phyical, demons of homosexuality integrate into their emotions. They cause their emotions to explode when in sin to the flesh or think that way. You might have a message dealing with true life homos that go through unbelievable pain (reach their emotions) and then SUDDENLY, JESUS IS REVEALED! This will work! I agree with you on it!
Scotty (Lowtax) - My boy Scotty is cleaning the oil off the dog!
Anointed - he's going to need a miracle for that one!
Scotty (Lowtax) - Jesuss specializes in miracles, as we both know!!! My boy Scotty drew this movie to use on the web-site. I think this is the perfect way to spread the message. Can I send it to you? It's in a program called "Falsh" that you need. I BELIEVE it is free, do you have it?
Anointed - no, I dont have it, send it to me.
(File sent: Jesus.swf)
Anointed - Let me ask this, once they are delievered, what is your plan to keep them that way?
Scotty (Lowtax) - We will have them enter there address and we will send them continuous streams of information and suggestions to keep Jesus in there lives and SATAN OUT!
Scotty (Lowtax) - PAMPALA NYAA!! SATAN WILL BE GONE!
This Week on Something Awful...
Pardon Our Dust
Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.
DEAR FURRIES: WE WERE WRONG
Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind
Let's improve landmarks
Landmarks and statues around the world: old, boring and could use an update.
Make Horror Wholesome
Join the SA Forum photoshop goons in their quest to make horror wholesome!
Every Conceivable Way EA Could Screw Up Star Wars: Squadrons
Yes, there are finally enough games for a new round of One Sentence Reviews
About This Column
Our Something Awful ICQ pranks target the worst and most idiotic folks on the Internet. Believe it or not, these ICQ pranks are all - unfortunately - real.
