Zack: Experience the thrill of the crystal parrot!
Steve: Faerun Frank and The Kingdom of the Crystal Parrot. I bet it holds amazing secrets like a big stupid UFO full of ghost aliens.
Zack: Yeah, well you can check it out for yourself. Key takeaway: The Crystal Parrot is a burglar alarm that telepathically lets you know when people walk into a room.
Steve: I am currently experiencing the thrill.
Zack: I have experienced a thrill.Steve: Will I experience another?
Zack: Do you have any interest in a claw of magic?
Steve: Nope.
Zack: Then the thrill is gone, Steve.
Steve: And so are we! See you next time, folks!
Zack: Don't forget to buy my goddamn book.
–
This Week on Something Awful...
Pardon Our Dust
Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.
DEAR FURRIES: WE WERE WRONG
Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind
Let's improve landmarks
Landmarks and statues around the world: old, boring and could use an update.
Make Horror Wholesome
Join the SA Forum photoshop goons in their quest to make horror wholesome!
Every Conceivable Way EA Could Screw Up Star Wars: Squadrons
Yes, there are finally enough games for a new round of One Sentence Reviews
About This Column
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.
Previous Articles
- D&D Module CB1: "Conan: Unchained!" - Part 2
- D&D Module CB1: "Conan: Unchained!" - Part 1
- Aliens Unlimited: Galaxy Guide (1997)
- Dungeons & Dragons Module B1: "In Search of the Unknown" - Part 2
- Dungeons & Dragons Module B1: "In Search of the Unknown" - Part 1
