Zack: "Oh, no. Where's the toilet!?"
Steve: He looks pretty confused by his surroundings.
Zack: "Seriously! I need the shitter like five minutes ago! I'm squeezing but it's got pressure behind it."
Zack: "This thing is gonna go off like a 10-gauge, so if you don't want me to blast a hole in the floor you better point me in the right direction, pronto."
Steve: I don't think I would want to summon one of these dudes. You're painting an unflattering picture.
Zack: "Ah, welp, never mind. Guess who is gonna be too busy scraping magma out of his trunks to block this next attack?"
This Week on Something Awful...
Pardon Our Dust
Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.
DEAR FURRIES: WE WERE WRONG
Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind
Let's improve landmarks
Landmarks and statues around the world: old, boring and could use an update.
Make Horror Wholesome
Join the SA Forum photoshop goons in their quest to make horror wholesome!
Every Conceivable Way EA Could Screw Up Star Wars: Squadrons
Yes, there are finally enough games for a new round of One Sentence Reviews
About This Column
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.
Previous Articles
- Heroes Unlimited (1984/1993)
- Space: 1889 (1988)
- Rifts Worldbook 20: Canada (1999)
- The Art of Werewolf: The Apocalypse (1990s)
- Dungeons & Dragons Christmas Elf Retrospective
