Zack: Stretchy heroes always struck me as the lowest tier of superhero.
Steve: It would be a fun power to have, but maybe not that cool compared to some other super powers.
Zack: There's a simple question to determine whether or not a super power is shitty.
Zack: Just ask: is this better than a gun?
Steve: If you need to reach something up on a really high shelf then being elastic is better than a gun.
Zack: Yeah, but if a guy had a gun and another guy is stretchy and they have to kill each other, which would you rather be?
Steve: It depends on the circumstances. If we have to fight each other in a series of chambers linked by tiny tunnels then I would rather be the stretchy guy.
This Week on Something Awful...
Pardon Our Dust
Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.
DEAR FURRIES: WE WERE WRONG
Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind
Let's improve landmarks
Landmarks and statues around the world: old, boring and could use an update.
Make Horror Wholesome
Join the SA Forum photoshop goons in their quest to make horror wholesome!
Every Conceivable Way EA Could Screw Up Star Wars: Squadrons
Yes, there are finally enough games for a new round of One Sentence Reviews
About This Column
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.
Previous Articles
- Vicious Turtles & Rampaging Eskimos: The Best of Pulp Cover Artwork
- Call of Cthulhu "1990's Handbook" - The Invisible Pattern (Part 3)
- Call of Cthulhu "1990's Handbook" - The Invisible Pattern (Part 2)
- Call of Cthulhu "1990's Handbook" - The Invisible Pattern (Part 1)
- The Macabre Fantasy Artwork of Ray O'Bannon (Part 2)
