If Films Were Reviewed Like Video Games

Paramount Pictures has had a lot of success in the past. They are a large company and they have a lot of money. For this reason, fans of the distributor know that their newest movie is sure to be good. World War Z is that newest movie. The camera never falls over during a scene. Actors are always in frame. The film runs at a steady 24 frames per second with very few frame drops. Since World War Z has a big enough budget to ensure that it doesn't have any glaring mistakes, we're happy to say that it will at least score a 7/10.

World War Z's visuals are top-notch. It has all sorts of cool effects like shadows, sunbeams pouring through windows. and impressive reflections on shiny surfaces. Multiple light sources hit objects at the same time, making everything look very realistic.

The screen that you see the movie on is quite large. When there is a close up of a face it's like you're looking at a giant. Impressive! As all true moviers know, World War Z was filmed with the Arri Alexa M cameras, so the resolution is very high and therefore very good and worth watching.

Many of the actors are attractive. Some of the women have flaws, which really takes you out of their respective scenes. I like scenes where a dog reacts to a situation by laying his head down then comedically covering his eyes with his paws while whimpering. That doesn't happen in this movie, which is rather unforgivable.

On to the sound. You can clearly hear everything that the actors say. The theater I saw the movie in had speakers that were likely running the latest firmware update. The music plays at the right time. When a scene gets sad the music becomes sad. When there is a battle the music becomes exciting. It is quite cinematic.

World War Z has a great story. A lot of people talk in it and things keep happening, which makes it cinematic. There are also a lot of impressive explosions, which make the movie even more cinematic. This is some next-gen stuff. You can clearly see everyone's facial expressions and everyone's face has a lot of detail so that makes the movie good.

There is a lot of shooting, and a lot of people get killed. It's very satisfying. Some people have been complaining about the level of violence as of late (I call them entitled whiners) but what else is going to be in a movie?

World War Z clocks in at 116 minutes, so it passes our dollar-to-entertainment ratio test with flying colors.

That said, the movie isn't perfect. My seat had a bit of a wobble to it, so I could never quite get comfortable. There aren't any scenes with dogs putting their paws over their eyes. I can't stress how important that is. It has been established as something that works, so it should be in every single movie. The makers of World War Z got lazy on that front.

Still, fans of the genre will have an absolute blast with this cinematic marvel. It might just be the Legend Of Zelda: A Link To The Past of movies. You should pay to see this movie because it functions and does many of the things you expect.

– Dennis "Corin Tucker's Stalker" Farrell (@DennisFarrell)