This week, the Something Awful Forum Goons talk to Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer -- thanks to his close, personal friend, forums user amf5, to get answers to the important questions we've carried for so long.
SB: Proceed.
Classicist: is that you?
SB: What the fuck kind of question is this? Of course it is.
Classicist: can you give me a copy of win7 then?
SB: Sure, just send me $260.
Hen: Post tits
SB: Try a porn site, weirdo.
Classicist: put your shoe on yor head.
SB: Fine. Why did I just do this?
Intel Penguin: Balmer why can't you put two different wallpapers on two different monitors if you've got dual screens?
SB: Eh? Only faggots need two monitors. Faggot.
This Week on Something Awful...
Pardon Our Dust
Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.
DEAR FURRIES: WE WERE WRONG
Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind
Let's improve landmarks
Landmarks and statues around the world: old, boring and could use an update.
Make Horror Wholesome
Join the SA Forum photoshop goons in their quest to make horror wholesome!
Every Conceivable Way EA Could Screw Up Star Wars: Squadrons
Yes, there are finally enough games for a new round of One Sentence Reviews
About This Column
The Comedy Goldmine examines the funniest and most creative threads from the Something Awful Forums. Although the Comedy Goldmine has changed authors many times over the years, its focus on the Something Awful Forums is still the same. Includes hilarious Photoshops, amusing work stories, parodies, and other types of oddball humor.
Previous Articles
- Image Makeovers!
- Misquoting Famous People
- Terrifying Jack-o'-Lanterns!
- What is this CSI investigating?
- The Many Faces of Barack Obama
