Redpilled My Little Pony Headcanons (Thanks, kate bush feelings!)

Redpilled My Little Pony Headcanons combines all the worst things about the modern Internet: Tumblr, fandoms, bronies (creepy dudes obsessed with a cartoon for preschool girls), redpillers (creepy dudes who think they are cool guys similar to Neo from The Matrix because they can see through the facade of feminism and political correctness), heavy-handed trolling, and headcanons (fanfiction without the effort of writing fanfiction).

Actually they DO post rude and offensive headcanons! >:)

This blog is sorta the "bad boy" of Tumblr's My Little Pony headcanon community. It was designed to be the antithesis of Diverse MLP Headcanons, where submitters excitedly theorize Princess Sparklehorse is secretly a female-presenting pangender gynosexual gray-aromantic naturekin with high-functioning autism and multiple headmates. Instead, Redpilled MLP Headcanons traffics in cutting-edge humor, like what if one of the ponies had a yeast infection??? Ha ha ha, this is so funny, to imagine the cartoon pony masturbating. It's truly a shame you can only fave it once.

A major theme of the blog is white pride, what with its white-pride background and seriously twisted headcanons like "Fluttershy is an ex-Nazi princess" and "Celestia is actually Hitler in disguise." Holy crap... did they just say Hitler... on the Internet?!

Other topics include:

• Bestiality

• Rape

• Genocide

• Racism

• Whatever the hell this is

Naturally, this obtusely ironic blog gets its fair share of scorn from outraged parties, allowing the head headcanonier to showcase his trademark wit. Sometimes the complaints aren't what you'd expect:

Hey, implying Scootaloo is a failed abortion is far less offensive than implying any of the ponies are christian/jewish/muslim/any brand of creationist retardation.

The most controversial post thus far is one simply claiming "Rarity is totally straight," which apparently caused quite the kerfuffle on a pony image board. Sometimes you gotta go with the subtle approach.

I wonder if Hasbro executives ever see stuff like this and regret what they've inflicted on the world, like Oppenheimer and the atomic bomb. That is, when they're not swimming in their money vaults Scrooge McDuck-style.

– Adam "rubber cat" Jameson (@robbercat)