The Mythical Menagerie

The Mythical Menagerie, submitted by Lappix. This site is utter chirping shit, run by a nutbar web woman with a penchant for dumbass animations, the worst cursor trails you ever did see, and almost non-navigable design. She also thinks she's cute or something, I don't know, I was too busy trying to hit the "X" up in the corner through the red rage that had clouded my vision.

Here is a Riddle for You
Search every page...
all the nooks and all the crannies...
If you look hard enough
you will find where the real Sixx{f}
hides her cute fanny...is rotflmao

LOLOLOLOLOLONO. I can get past all this shit. It's all just ordinary crap like so many other shitty sites we've featured here as an Awful Link of the Day. Then I found this.

Hello, my name is Tootie

I was adopted By: Sixx

Hello there Tootie! Please leave my fucking nightmares! WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?! WHAT NOOOOO GOD! This is the scariest thing I've seen on the Internet in months. It's scarier than the worst fanfiction featuring Optimus Prime having sex with a dragon. It's worse than that Japanese anime porn with women being mutilated. This is...I can't look at it.

Sign her guestbook or something, or just mail me enough sleeping pills for me to black out my memories of Tootie.

– Zack "Geist Editor" Parsons (@sexyfacts4u)