Gannon-Banned

Gannon-Banned, submitted by Metal Gear Biscuit. If you've been slacking off and making forum posts containing inaccuracies about the Zelda series (and I know you have), you are in big time trouble. Some guy is so obsessed with the games that he coined a phrase "GANNON-BANNED!" to illustrate his superiority over other people who don't know trivial details about his beloved franchise. Oh yeah, he came up with this phrase six years ago and is still clinging to it.

This site lists the numerous rules you must follow to avoid being Gannon-Banned, ranging from the nitpicky...

4. Spelling common terms wrong:

This is the killer. If you correct yourself quickly, I don't mind. But if you misspell anything Zelda related, you are toast. Especially on common terms. Like Moblin. It is not Molblin. Pull that stunt, and I will GANNON-BAN you

...to the questionable:

13. Claiming Soul Calibur II/CD-I games are part of the timeline:

People think just because a game has Link in it, and it mentions Hyrule, it is part of the timeline. Unless the game is made by Nintendo or was co-developed by Nintendo, like the Oracle series, it's not part of the timeline. And no, the CD-I games don't count, either.

Wow, I didn't realize the CD-I games didn't count. If the good installments of a series are the only ones that count, I'd better get on the phone with George Lucas and Robert Jordan immediately. They're going to be so fucking pumped.

In closing, I hope you all learn your lesson. No matter where you go, there is always going to be somebody watching you. And the moment you screw up, you'll be GANNON-BANNED faster than an Octorok on Crack.

– Corin Tucker's Stalker (@DennisFarrell)