Goddess Dreams Celebrity E-mail, submitted by blueball. Ever wanted to send an e-mail to a celebrity? How about a pathetic and half-crazed e-mail? How about one that that they will never read? How about one that is posted on a public web site along with your e-mail address? If you answered yes to all of these questions than the Celebrity E-mails at Goddess Dreams are for you! Goddess Dreams offers forms by which you can submit e-mails to your favorite female celebrities. Creepy e-mails in which you try to seduce them or hit them up for money, and the best part isn't even that the celebrities are never going to read any of them, it's that your e-mails are public! Let's see what Angelina Jolie's fans want to say to her:
Dear Angelina Jolie,I am very glad to meet you.
Let me introduce myself.
My name is Migele, I work at an Armenia based American software company.
Like very much to meet Attractive people.
There was no other way in this situation to e-mail you (I do not like forums etc.), though even now, I do not believe that You will read it. Anyway it is my chance before I become very rich and famous. I am sure after couple of years it will be cool.
So let me express my thoughts to You. I have read today in russian internet paper www.utro.ru, there was an article that you have not experienced pleasure for the latest year, that there was no man by your side. I am very much handsome (this is not only my opinion), can make all your dreams come true. If you agree, please do not hesitate e-mail me and I will come to You.
WHERE CAN SHE GET YOUR NUMBER!? SHE NEEDS TO EXPERIENCE YOUR PLEASURE IMMEDIATELY MIGELE!
Angelina is kind of crazy though, maybe she attracts like-minded fans. Surely the clean cut vampire slayer herself Sarah Michelle Gellar wouldn't draw sleazy nut balls like Migele. Or would she!?! (Dun dun dun)...
(From Bignasdy)
Hey baby girl! love ya! Im an old dude, that needs 2500.00 bucks to get the Bike of my dreams. Ill give you a ride, and pay ya back in a timely manner!
Thanx and get ready to hang on!
d
The "d", is it for Dracula?! Does the sanguine count himself sink to requesting a loan for a motorcycle from a vampire slayer?!
Well, I suppose Sarah has a lot of really nerdy fans and teenage girls writing her, maybe a more established and mature star like Catherine Zeta Jones draws a better crowd.
Hi Catherine! I tried to get a hold of you once before, but I guess you didn't have time to read the email or it just never got to you. Look, I know it's hard for you to deal with the constant show biz, but I just wanted to let you know that I'm not giving up on trying to reach you. I'm never giving up on anything that has to do with you. Do you have any idea what it's like to desperately try to get a hold of someone but trying even at your best, you sill can't? I really, really love you and I know that you probably get that a lot. Only this time, its really true. Like I said before, I think my heart stopped beating that day when I found out you married Michael Douglas. What do you see in him? I realy hope its his bank account, and I really hope you don't realy love him. A lot of people would think that's shallow, but I don't. It would be a good thing for me if you really didn't love him. Simply put, I really don't give a shit about what he thinks, or what he might try to do. I don't give a f**k about the police, or the online detective m****r f*****S. I know that sounds direspectful, but to him and his side of the family. I have the highest utmost respect for you and your parents and family, and I don't want to interfere with anything good you have going on now, but I just can't take it anymore. You're really special... you know that don't you? I always pray to God that someday I'll meet you, and he hasn't ansewered those prayers yet. I'm not just another goofball m****r f****r that sends you letters like this for no reason, my reason is all the reason in the world. You are the world, you are everything, and your the only reason I believe in love. It hurts so bad when I think of you and old man Mike holding eachother and him poppin' kids out of you! I absolutely despise your husband! Its a burning hatred I'll never get over! Every day, I wake up, and every day I'm without you. The sun shines through the windows, but the room just doesn't shine like it would if you where here, or I was there, or we where somewhere. You and I could change Hollywood, and end up the richest couple ever in show biz. I'd love to meet your father, and your mother. You all look like interesting, loving people. This is risky business sending you this letter, but anything has to be worth it when it comes to you. Just don't crush my hopes, please send me something back. And once again, I don't give a s**t about Mike or who he is. What does he think he's gonna' do? He can't hurt me physically and he sure in the hell can't hurt me in the courtroom either. Please please please write me back! Pretty please Catherine! It really, really means a lot to me. I'm sure you can trace my email address anytime you want, but incase you can't or you forget, its Sean Jones@aol.com (don't ask). If not, I'll try to get a hold of you again. Bye...
Uhhhhhhhhhhh...
So, uh, if you want to e-mail Catherine Zeta Jones your long, insane, and probably illegal rants, then this is the web site for you! Be warned, the site spawns a lot of pop-unders.
–
Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.
Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind
Landmarks and statues around the world: old, boring and could use an update.
Join the SA Forum photoshop goons in their quest to make horror wholesome!
Yes, there are finally enough games for a new round of One Sentence Reviews
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.
Copyright ©2024 Jeffrey "of" YOSPOS & Something Awful