LJ Drama, submitted by DrDog1235. First off, I'd like to admit that I don't find this link awful at all! I know these gloomy kids down the street who run their own LiveJournal on the Internet™ and let me tell you ladies and gents, that thing is the pits! Black backgrounds, dark grey text, down-and-out paragraphs detailing the ho-hum events in their lives... this is no way to go, my friends! It looks to me like a lot of people on the LiveJournal circuit have a few too many unhappy atoms stuck in their brains, because they need to just get up and shout, "hey, I'm me, I'm proud to be alive!" That's a good idea, my next public show will be entitled, "Hey, I'm Me!" and it will be for all the depressed and weepy little LiveJournal kiddies who can only express their rage and sadness by quoting Slipknot lyrics and using one of those Comet Cursors that changes your mouse pointer thingy into a scary satanic pentagram! Come on boys and girls, things will get better! Don't feel like a sad sack just because mom and dad don't understand you and your black fishnet stockings!

Let's get this straight: IF YOU ARE FEATURED ON HERE IT'S BECAUSE YOU'RE AN IDIOT. That's it, you lost. No argument. The only way you can keep your dignity is by going the way of #1. Anything else makes you look like even more of a loser. Why? Think about...

LJdrama has often been compared to a LJ-specific tabloid, and while I'd rather look at the site as a fascinating sociological and anthropological experiment (combined with very potent social commentary), I can definitely see where those analogists are coming from. In that case, ladies and gentlemen, learn from the tabloids! What do you think Oprah Whinprey does when they talk shit about her in the Enquirer? Nothing! Because who gives a fuck what they say? It's funny—that's why you read it.

This cool cat is telling it "like it is," and all you Internet™ negative Nancies should take his advice and turn those frown atoms upside-down! I fully support positive and uplifting sites like this one, pages that encourage these frustrated youth-gone-wrong to change their ways and become productive members of society, perhaps ones that shovel coal into popular locomotives? It's a proven scientific fact that a good work ethic keeps the spirits high and the mind off negative thoughts such as the average teenage angst, so let's rally support for sites like these which give a collective wake up call to these down and out kids! Turn off that Slipknot and get the happy atoms flowing in your brains, fellahs! And remember folks, look for me in my upcoming show, "Hey, I'm Me!" which will be debuting at either the Remmington Hills Bowling Alley or the alley behind the Remmington Hills Bowling Alley! It's gonna be a blast!

– Doctor Science Professor

More Awful Link of the Day

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Pardon Our Dust

    Pardon Our Dust

    Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.

  • DEAR FURRIES: WE WERE WRONG

    DEAR FURRIES: WE WERE WRONG

    Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind

Copyright ©2024 Jeffrey "of" YOSPOS & Something Awful