2003 SUMMAR PREVIEW FOR "TEH MATRIX: PART 2"

STARRING

"NEO" - Keannu Reeves
"Morpehaous" - Fred Williamson
"Trinity" - I forgot her naem, teh birdface woman
"Agent Barnyard" - John Kruk
"Bonzi Buddey" - John Kruk

OH NO NEO SI IN CYBARSPACE, HELP FETUS ROBOTS WIN THES GAME FROM A MONSTAR!!!

I haev too admit taht "The MAtraxi" was one of my favoarite movies alltime, narrowly beating out "Kangaroo Jack" adn "All teh Pretty Horses." The MAtrix had evarything in it: guns, a juimping off teh walls, flying guns, a bullet tiem, evil computar machenes, numbers that flew, flying gun bullets in slowar motian, juimping into a gun, dead police men, computar hackeing, Kevin Mitnick, oven trailers, a old womans kitchen, stairs, mature women in clotheing, head spark plugs, mechaanical squids, Japaneseses assasins, tiem traval, volcanos, a monstar, slow time at fastar speed, magic, wizzards, some dirty place, Kung Few, fighting, a lot of mess explodsians EVARYWHERE, and just about anything else yuo can names! it was great, it was about a man sucked into a computar machene to save teh worald from cyborg robots who make fetuses from yuo and me! OH NO!!! I DO NOT WANT TO BECOME ROBOT FETUS, SO SAEV ME BATMAN OR BETTAR YET ROBIN WILLIAMS

but they are not in thes movie, but Keanue Reaves si, he is "Neo" witch stands for "Neosporin" becuase he makes yuor cuts disapear when he colects YUOR COMPUTAR SOUL!!!! In part 1 he found out his powars from a computar game and now in part 2 he has his powars and must protect a computar machene from being hackXored by a evil computer virus named "AGENT BARNYARD" who sends out his virus named "BONZI BUDDY" to attack adn destroys all teh computars! THIS CANNOT HAPPEN BECUASE IF TEH COMPUTARS DIE THEN BABY MACHINE FETUSES DIE AND YUO AND ME DIE!!! so Neo teams up with Morhpehasuas or Kazaa or whatevar to save teh humanity from evil. Here si teh tips I got:

FROM: Jorry
SUBJECT: THE MATRIX, PART 2

Hello Jeff K., I have some information for you about "The Matrix, Part 2". This is a very exciting, computer dependant movie which uses special cutting-edge special effects to make many scenes. For example, I watched in their movie lab as they made the following scenes on their motherboard computers:

1) Neo jumps into a biplane from a castle just before the moth swarms over it and turns the castle's bricks into sand,
2) Neo shoots a gun at an old man, but the bullet splits in two and one part of the bullet fly's into a crow's butt, LOL
3) Neo jumps out of the way of a bullet, but time slows down and he moves very quickly, he punches a crow in the face and then tips over a large gas station so he can save the machine fetus colony.

John Kruk plays two exciting roles in this film, one as "Agent Barnyard," a deadly computer virus mastermind who has created "Bonzi Buddy" to attack the Machine Fetus land of Mechafetusville. With all the makeup and special effect, it is nearly impossible to tell that John Kruk is playing two different rolls. You will be very surprised at the ending, in which John Kruk gets killed by electricity shots and explodes into particles which infest his mainline computer mother board. It's very exciting and I don't think anything will be able to topple this action giant from its throne of gold.

- Jorry
PS: you did not return my last email about the playstation. I am going to stop writing you "tips" if you don't return it. My mom is very angry right now.

WOW! thes movie looks allmost as good as teh First Matrox movie where Neo shots bullets at a wall and AGENT SMITH is VERY EVIL!!! they tryed to tortare him but didant suceed becuase he has nerves of STEELE and yuo cant break a man who stands for virtue and paragone! I once wanted too be liek Neo so I tried jumpiung off a wall into a trash can but teh wall made me fall ovar and then I got in troubal becuase it was in teh middal of hissotry class and my teacher Mr. Nickels si SOEM KIND OF SHITTY TEACHAR IF YUO ASKS ME!!! who cares about historys, I wont need to know history in my future job of GAME PROGRAMMAR when I help maek Quake 4: Quack Atack! SO I wish Neo would kill Mr. Nickels becuase he's just terrable any way yuo look at it and Id rathar watch a movie than read about Pillgrims!!! I HATE TEH PILLGRAMS!!!!!!!! ARGGHH!

PAGE 3: LORD OF TEH TOW TOWARS PART 2: RETURN OF TEH KING

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