Enoch Yablonski: "I'M STILL UPDATING CLIFF'S COMPUTER SCREEN PAGE WHETHER YOU JACKASSED GREASEBALLS LIKE IT OR NOT, THAT LITTLE PUSSY CLIFFY SAID HE WAS GOING TO COME OVER HERE AND TRY TO FIND ENOUGH STRENGTH TO SWING ONE OF HIS MEATY PAWS AT MY FACE, BUT I KNOW HE'S FULL OF SHIT SO FUCK YOU CLIFF, OH I GUESS I SHOULD COMMENT ON THESE PICTURES OF PEOPLE, CHECKOUT CAPTAIN KEYBOARD OVER THERE, HE'S MODEMING HIS WAY INTO CYBERSPACE WITH VIRTUAL NERD HAT."

Enoch Yablonski: "LITTLE JENNY HARGRAVE WISHES FOR A NEW FACE WHILE ED BARLINGSTON, DRESSED UP AS SANTA, WISHES THAT LITTLE JENNY GET THE HELL OFF HIS LAP AND BE REPLACED BY ONE OF THEM HOT CHICKS AT THE HOOTERS ON 15TH STREET, THOSE BITCHES ARE A FINE SET OF TITTIES I TELL YOU, ONE TIME I WENT THERE AND ORDERED THE BUFFALO WINGS AND SAID TO THE DAME SERVING ME, 'HEY BABY, WHY DON'T YOU TAKE THEM BUFFALO WINGS AND RUB THEM UP AGAINST MY DICK?' AND SHE SAID 'OH ENOCH, YOU'RE SUCH A STUD, UNLIKE YOUR DEADBEAT BROTHER CLIFF WHO COULDN'T GET IT UP IF HE COMMANDEERED AN ENTIRE TRUCK OF VIAGRA,' AND I TIPPED HER 38 CENTS BECAUSE THE BUFFALO WINGS THERE SUCK SHIT."

Enoch Yablonski: "THREE MARSHMALLOW QUEENS WASH UP ON SHORE OF THE LOCAL PIZZA PLACENTA RESTAURANT, THE ONE IN THE MIDDLE IS WEARING A TARMAC MADE BY KNITTING 15 TWISTER BOARDS TOGETHER AND DRAPING IT OVER HER WHILE SHE TRIED TO REACH UP AND GRAB A TURKEY DRUMSTICK DANGLING OVER HER HEAD, AND THE ONE ON THE RIGHT IS TRYING TO WITHDRAW HER HEAD INTO HER STOMACH LIKE SOME KIND OF DOUGHY RETARDED TURTLE."

Enoch Yablonski: "TWO TRASHBAGS WALK INTO THE PLASTIC SURGEON'S CLINIC AND DRAW PICTURES OF WHAT THEY'D LIKE TO LOOK LIKE, SORRY FELLAHS, YOU'RE STUCK BEING 'SHORT SQUASH' AND 'TALL TARD' UNTIL THE DAY YOU DIE, WHICH WILL BE NEXT THURSDAY IF I'M ON SCHEDULE, AND I AM."