Email CliffCLIFF YABLONSKI HATES THESE PEOPLE:
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I HATE YOU PAGE 95
- Evil supermutant Bryce Collins arises from the Appleton Lake so he may destroy Gamera, Mothra, Godzilla, several pony kegs full of Milwaukee's Best, and a 10-foot long sub (sandwich).
- Oh no run! It's the West Appleton Ninja Goth Association! They quietly break into your house in the middle of the night, then read poetry about crows and tombstones to you while cutting their arms with their own swords.
- Slothlike simpleton Wendy Bennings takes a break from bankrupting "All You Can Eat" joints so she may reenact her favorite performance from the hit musical "Lard on Ice".
- After doing some tests in the wind tunnel, Mel Reynolds' face never quite got back to normal. Either that or squirrels have been storing nuts in his ugly mug for the past six decades. I bet he ate the squirrels too.
- Used car salesman Eddie Espenoza. You don't want to know what the cars have been used for, but it sure as hell wasn't for driving.
- The North Appleton City Community Theater's performance of "Cabaret". Believe it or not, this is actually supposed to be one of the female dancers, not the MC.